faith.

This one is going to be short, and will most likely not have anything to do with motherhood at all. This is about my faith, which has undergone significant challenges. Here is what I have learned, and whether it is what others know to be the truth, or is something that is simply getting me by, I will cling to it in the times of hardship and ease.


I am learning that God has nothing to do with some things. I am learning that saying miracles happen sometimes gives a hope that can lead to a loss of faith. While I know miracles can happen, and that can and does God cure some of  those who are sick and hurting, I think it is important not to pray for one. What happens if I pray for my miracle and it is never revealed? I can't hold onto that prayer because after the "let down" the reality of loosing my faith becomes all too real. So instead of clinging to the hope of divine healing, I will hold onto the fact that sometimes God doesn't get Himself involved in human trials. Afterall, in the book of Job God did not cause any injury to Job or his family, he simply instructed Evil to not take the life of Job. He did not give a miracle for the man, he did not heal his hurts, he simply gave an instruction to Evil. 


A friend of mine once said that praying for a miracle is sometimes selfish. She went on to say that by praying for a miracle of healing we are praying a person stays with us on this earth, and we are praying that they are kept longer from their eternal kingdom. I agree with her. So instead of praying for a miracle, I will pray for the ease of hurting and anguish. I'll pray that when these times of trial end we all still have our faith. And I will pray that miracles do happen for those who deserve them. 


Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. (Proverbs 3:5-6)